Trail of Ants

It was a classic play. Some would say a suave snatch, others a seductive triumph. Each time I look back at the moment, I applaud and tip my crown in respect. I’m newly single, ‘off women’ and emitting that couldn’t-care-less, rough attitude that comes with unkempt hair, sparse stubble, a loose tongue and yesterdays t-shirt. I saw the way she looked at my friend, it was a look of assurance. Her eyes rolled him around and left me playing the dutiful observer in her royal court. As we turned to leave however, she revealed her bluff and made her move – on me. Jackie is a gorgeous redhead, typically passionate and playful. As my back was turned, she placed her hand assertively on my shoulder. She was guilty of intent, while I was innocent of any invitation. Within seconds she’d wrapped her legs round my waist, allowing her warm paunch to sink around me and tighten almost every one of my muscles. There was nothing I could do, other than the same as any English gent born of the eighties – I lowered her gently onto her back and into the classic Missionary Position. Voyeuristic photographers stood their ground but as I looked over her bust and brow, her devious play dawned on me. She was making him jealous. Him being an enormous, fully-grown and worryingly wild orang-utan. The authority of the Sumatran rainforest, and I was deep within his territory. Continue reading ‘The Flirt of the Forest’