Published June 15th, 2007
in Uncategorized.
Ok. Right. I’m making a new rule for TrailofAnts.com; for every person who asks me “how can you afford to take such a trip?” or any deviation on this question, they have to flick a quid into my rusty can, which as yet is a mirage upon the horizon. I’m going to take you back in time now, via a new process I’ve invented- blognosis (patent pending).
Look into my eyes, look into my eyes. Not around the eyes. Look into my eyes. Your eye lids are getting heavy. Count to 5. 1, a river is flowing melodically over your toes. 2, a field of corn is gently fanning your sun kissed face. 3, all surrounding noise starts to appear distant. 4, all worries and concerns you had are forgotten. 5, I am gently removing your wallet and quietly leaving the room. Continue reading ‘Look into my eyes…’
Published June 13th, 2007
in Uncategorized.
Earlier today I threw a pen between my hands, trying in vain to break the curse of writers block. It was as I recovered the pen from the dreary carpet for the umpteenth time, that I was struck with the idea of the new Post-It note designs that now proudly adorn the header of my little pragmatic site. I figured it was about time I banished the somewhat egotistical ‘Polaroid’ design to the cyber dustbin. It had been bugging me for a while, so with less than 3 weeks to go until I am officially Photoshopless, I decided today was the day.
If I were a poncy art critic, I’d tell you that “the juxtaposition of the notes and familiar components within the artists environment, create a powerful sense of understanding for the viewer. By substituting the human element with handwritten notes, he triggers a release clause in our psyche that informs us that the artist, is no longer in such familiar territory. Now, can I top that glass up with more ghastly champagne darling? Where did you get that blouse?”. Continue reading ‘Such grand designs?’
Published May 23rd, 2007
in Uncategorized.
Regular eagle-eyed viewers of The Trail will notice strange things-a-happening along it’s misty path recently. A few posts and edits have gone astray, so to avoid technophobes chewing the mouse mat I’ll summarise what happened, in fairytale speak;
“I was sitting here blissfully daydreaming out of the window, when I observed a handsome young man (who we’ll call Softy Ware) sidle up alongside a gorgeous looking Aphrodite-esq lady (who we’ll call Katoo Theme). They didn’t appear to have enough in common, so Katoo swiftly sent Softy packing with a few harsh words. Softy wasn’t used to rejection so as he left, he stripped away Katoo’s blouse leaving her naked buxom bobbing around in the summer sunshine. Naturally Katoo was embarrassed, so she swiftly covered her entire body with leaves from the rare, Error Tree. Now covered in Errors, Katoo sulked off home as she leaked her dignity all over The Trail. Meanwhile, Softy took his smarmy ways back into a dark cave where he laughed for hours in the most evil manner. Continue reading ‘The Battle of MySQL’
